Elliot Yi
2 min readNov 28, 2021

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Congruence

Congruence is a word few of us are familiar with and fewer of us use. But it is a powerful word. It describes a state we can achieve. One that is powerful, transcendent. When we are congruent we are aligned and when we are aligned we are at peace.

Approximately fifty thousand years ago this thing called language started to evolve in humans. This superpower would empower those of us with mastery over it an incredible number of abilities that are limitless. Although we think in images we give meaning to those images with our words. And it is with our words we were able to create technologies responsible for progress. With these words we create poetry, stories, narratives, music, our words let us experience and create love, we can write books and so forth. But these all require that we develop our skill of language and most of us just learn the bare minimum to get by.

When language evolved it co-opted an enormous amount cortical wiring in the brain. This had the effect of disrupting a link between the parts of the brain where we gather knowledge and create belief. This is why we can know something intellectually but still feel something different. This is problematic because feeling tends to win out most of the time with respect to behavior. We have all experienced it. We have all done something we knew we didn't want to do but seemingly couldn't help ourselves. We were incongruent.

Congruence is powerful for a few reasons. One is it speaks to the subconscious. It speaks to your subconscious self and to the subconscious of others. It subconsciously builds credibility. When what you think, say, feel, and do are in alignment, you are congruent and very powerful. This is intrinsic power. When what you say is different from what you do, you create chaos and confusion for yourself and others. Is there anything more confusing than someone telling you they love you but not acting like it?

Congruence is achieved easiest by having a clearly stated purpose and a set of values and always behaving into them. Behavior creates feeling which then creates behavior. Thinking creates feeling which also creates behavior but this is a high skill. Write down your purpose, write down your values and create routines and habits centered around them and in no time you will be congruent and operating in your power.

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Elliot Yi

Elliot is a personal development author. His latest book, "The Road to Personal Mastery" out now.